Do we just live and suffer and die?
My cat died April 16th, 2023. Had a few, never have another. Can I share my story? I swear there’s a point at the end.
Adopted her from a local redditor, who had only had her a month. She was always tiny, but at some point, cancer wasted her overnight. By the time I noticed her collar falling off her 1.5" neck it was too late. We found her dead in the hallway the next night.
She sat on my lap every night, and that’s all she wanted, simple affection. I was single and living alone, excepting a friend with benefits across the street, I was terribly alone. She was my solace, my peace. She was my friend, not an animal, not a pet, my friend. And gods how I cried because I felt I had let my dear friend down. Hell, crying now.
“WHY?!”, I screamed. Why was such a blameless and harmless friend dead when I’ve done such evil in life?! I’ve tried to be one of the good guys, but I’ve done bad things. She had no concept of evil, she just was, and only asked for comfort. Call it survivor guilt, guess it is. But a life like hers clearly deserved more life than my tainted soul.
She didn’t do any of the typical cat meme stuff, just kinda hung around. Rarely left the yard, just sat in the shadow of my truck when it was hot, chilled inside when it was cold. Always low energy, but no issues the vet could point to.
Anyway, I buried her out at my personal chunk of swamp in the boonies. Fought for 30 minutes to cut through cypress roots, but I wanted her to rest in a nice shady spot by the water. Literal blood, sweat and tears getting that tiny grave open. Didn’t think anyone would give a shit, but my friends all rolled out. I’m the guy in the cowboy hat. I salute her grave every time I pass.
Mom died 2-weeks ago, on my birthday. I cried for that cat far more than for her. I get you. I feel you. LOL, I’m sure mom cried more for the death of her mountain lions than she would have for me. So it goes.
So yeah, we live and we die. Our friends and family die. Suffering? I dunno. Did my cat suffer? She certainly did for at least some of her life. But she certainly didn’t after I got her. At least she was as happy as I knew how to make her.
Suffering is only possible if you’re alive. Hell, we could be atoms embedded in a Jovian moon, but at least we’re here to feel. And that’s pretty fucking wild if you think about it. I’ve suffered like hell, but I’ve also experienced and loved more than the vast majority of humans ever will. (And if you looked at our pics, the little Asian woman is now my wife. Funny how life works out.) If I died tonight, I’d call it a win. Being alive is a fabulous gift, even though it has its downsides.
How about you tell us about your cat? Your turn OP. Step up and let us have it.
I truly appreciate your story because I’ve been there. Had my best friend for 13 years - the cat who would be waiting by the door when I got home from work, who would cry out in the house if she didn’t know what room I was in. The one who was always on my lap and who slept right next to me snuggled up against me in bed at night. She was the perfect cat and friend, and even though it’s been 8 years, I still think about her on an almost daily basis.
I love how you gave your friend such a loving and caring place to rest. I’m sending you random internet stranger hugs and good vibes. <3
Man, I can’t believe I’m still crying about a fucking cat. But you get me.
She was always there. She was there when I was so very lonely and depressed. She wasn’t bitchy or loud or insistent, she just appeared on my lap when I finally sat down for the evening.
Check the videos I posted, those are people who never gave a shit about a cat and loved her dearly. I know, they came to the funeral for me, those events are always for the survivors, but still, they had words.
Glad OP posted this so we could all share, get it out some.
What’s wrong about crying about a cat? It’s like losing a family member after all.
I lost my cat two years ago and miss her dearly. We vowed no more pets but as time went on we missed having a pet. So we got another cat.
It’s hard when the end feels so cruel but having years of joy outweighs the weeks of sadness.
I’m sorry for your loss, bud. I lost my dog last week in a similar way. I took her in for a routine tooth cleaning, they found a mass in her abdomen, and her body wasn’t strong enough to recover from the anesthesia 😞.
She was so young, and as you point out, so incontrovertibly innocent. It’s been a difficult time this week accepting that she’s suddenly gone from my and my partner’s life.
A friend shared this with me and it’s been “living rent free” as they say.
Time is an illusion that makes things make sense,
So we’re always living in the present tense.
It seems so unforgiving when a good thing ends,
But you and I will always be back then.
Here’s to animal friends making us our most human selves.
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
