We spend a lot of time pursuing staggeringly and self-evidently pointless and stupid shit while suppressing and teaching being ashamed of sex and sexuality, to the point many just categorize their sexuality under potential trauma if engaged.
If we spent a lot less time grinding for nothing of import and more time fucking one another rather than fucking one another over for paper simulacra of supposed value, our species would be far more well adjusted. Even the difference between less prudish Europe and the puritanical US in general mental health is extremely apparent.
The way we treat sex, as something to shame behind close doors rather than celebrate, as we glorify plastic and silicon garbage, is beyond ridiculous and leads to shame and trauma in girls who become women and anger and resentment in boys that become men. We aren’t economic value producing machines, we’re fucking machines. We denied that at our peril, and now very few are happy with the state of things. Breathtakingly bad priorities.
I’d extrapolate this priorities conversation from “sex” to pleasure. Hobbies, video games, casually socializing, and sex as you said. Obviously different people enjoy different activities to different extents. But this greater conversation is the hill I will die on.
USAmericans society has retained this conservative/puritanical idea that your work is your life, “idle hands are the devil’s plaything”, and everything else: vacations, video games, hobbies, sex… is a way to “unwind” so you can get back to work. The way we talk about these endeavors is truly depressing. We categorize and judge people based on “What do you do for work?”, and hobbies and other entertainment is reserved for those truly close to us.
Steve, who works in Accounting, might hate his job and only live for MTG Arena, but most conversations will steer toward How he survives rather than Why.
Even sex and romance has been relegated to a systematic process, talked about and hijacked by consumerism more as a way to advance social standing, than for love or pleasure. Date (buy food), Engagement (buy ring), Marriage (fund ceremony, buy ring). And this is without any legal framework that requires that or prohibits casual hookups/co-habitation.
This whole “side-hustle”, “grindset”, “become the brand” extremist capitalist bullshit grates my sanity every time I hear it. That is what I believe creates the mental health difference “less prudish Europe” and “puritanical US”, as you pointed out.
I believe the idea vision of society is where we automate as much of our necessary processes as possible, implement a comfortable UBI, and pay people a good amount for filling those positions. Why the rest of society doesn’t think that is beyond me.
After all, human society is made by humans, for humans. It should not be geared for labor machines.
Hedonism is an oft criticised motivation. Yet when we think of what we want for our kids, our families, our friends; so often it boils down to “I want them to be happy”.
The point of what? Life? Humanity? Existing? Existence?
I get the anti-anti-sexuality, but doesn’t this boil life down to… Not even procreation, but … Sex?
What about asexual people? What about… Wonderful moments or beautiful things or cake or socializing beyond sex? What about WORDS and complex thought and ideas and puns and coffee and art and adrenaline and naps and music?
I can’t say I entirely disagree with you, but I also don’t agree, primarily because I’m not sure exactly what the hill you’re dying on is. Can you elaborate a bit to help me/us understand exactly what you’re trying to say?
I’m saying that human civilization, and especially puritanical societies of this civilization of which we are one in the US, have walled away the core of what we are, animals that want to fuck, trained us through a prism of shame to loathe that part of us, that we darkly call being civilized, and filled our days generating things that will provide us no meaning, as the closest thing to meaning that can be derived by our biology is getting as much dopamine and serotonin as possible through physical human connection, and we spend most of our time being told the greatest lever for that is shameful and harmful usually because it doesn’t make strangers richer, which is ridiculous in an age where if we had the correct priorities we would be able to do for fun as procreation that comes as a result is now chemically optional.
My point is humanity spends a whole lot of its time being miserable, toiling for widgets, to pursue or accept sexual partners in a roundabout way because we’ve made that that a small, token, conditional cookie for doing the “important” stuff, which I find sad and fascinating to observe. The point being used as a bargaining chip for the pointless, and then all parties wondering why they’re still anxious and depressed because they either didn’t come to terms, or because they did and it turns out all the plastic, silicon, and tea in china can’t provide even a passing shadow of the fulfillment of genuine, physical human connection can, and even that physical human connection is tarnished being turned into just another form of currency or coercion for stuff that doesn’t matter at all. How much does humanity toiling for that does not matter instead of fucking?
Tldr humanity would be happier if we were trained to see sex as connection with one another and not that dirty, evil thing of which we rarely speak and if we do it is with the utmost sense of serious danger. It’s too late for most existing humans though, as you can’t go to full grown adults steeped in that cultural stigma and say “oops we fucked up, our sexuality isnt some taboo evil thing with no place in society.” The damage is done. My hill is that shouldn’t continue that harmful culture going forward, but I recognize I’ll die on that hill as a tiny minority that sees the harm it does.
Sexuality is the point.
We spend a lot of time pursuing staggeringly and self-evidently pointless and stupid shit while suppressing and teaching being ashamed of sex and sexuality, to the point many just categorize their sexuality under potential trauma if engaged.
If we spent a lot less time grinding for nothing of import and more time fucking one another rather than fucking one another over for paper simulacra of supposed value, our species would be far more well adjusted. Even the difference between less prudish Europe and the puritanical US in general mental health is extremely apparent.
The way we treat sex, as something to shame behind close doors rather than celebrate, as we glorify plastic and silicon garbage, is beyond ridiculous and leads to shame and trauma in girls who become women and anger and resentment in boys that become men. We aren’t economic value producing machines, we’re fucking machines. We denied that at our peril, and now very few are happy with the state of things. Breathtakingly bad priorities.
I’d extrapolate this priorities conversation from “sex” to pleasure. Hobbies, video games, casually socializing, and sex as you said. Obviously different people enjoy different activities to different extents. But this greater conversation is the hill I will die on.
USAmericans society has retained this conservative/puritanical idea that your work is your life, “idle hands are the devil’s plaything”, and everything else: vacations, video games, hobbies, sex… is a way to “unwind” so you can get back to work. The way we talk about these endeavors is truly depressing. We categorize and judge people based on “What do you do for work?”, and hobbies and other entertainment is reserved for those truly close to us. Steve, who works in Accounting, might hate his job and only live for MTG Arena, but most conversations will steer toward How he survives rather than Why. Even sex and romance has been relegated to a systematic process, talked about and hijacked by consumerism more as a way to advance social standing, than for love or pleasure. Date (buy food), Engagement (buy ring), Marriage (fund ceremony, buy ring). And this is without any legal framework that requires that or prohibits casual hookups/co-habitation.
This whole “side-hustle”, “grindset”, “become the brand” extremist capitalist bullshit grates my sanity every time I hear it. That is what I believe creates the mental health difference “less prudish Europe” and “puritanical US”, as you pointed out. I believe the idea vision of society is where we automate as much of our necessary processes as possible, implement a comfortable UBI, and pay people a good amount for filling those positions. Why the rest of society doesn’t think that is beyond me.
After all, human society is made by humans, for humans. It should not be geared for labor machines.
Hedonism is an oft criticised motivation. Yet when we think of what we want for our kids, our families, our friends; so often it boils down to “I want them to be happy”.
huh, never heard that term before. but I looked it up, and yeah, I guess that’s it.
The point of what? Life? Humanity? Existing? Existence?
I get the anti-anti-sexuality, but doesn’t this boil life down to… Not even procreation, but … Sex?
What about asexual people? What about… Wonderful moments or beautiful things or cake or socializing beyond sex? What about WORDS and complex thought and ideas and puns and coffee and art and adrenaline and naps and music?
I can’t say I entirely disagree with you, but I also don’t agree, primarily because I’m not sure exactly what the hill you’re dying on is. Can you elaborate a bit to help me/us understand exactly what you’re trying to say?
I’m saying that human civilization, and especially puritanical societies of this civilization of which we are one in the US, have walled away the core of what we are, animals that want to fuck, trained us through a prism of shame to loathe that part of us, that we darkly call being civilized, and filled our days generating things that will provide us no meaning, as the closest thing to meaning that can be derived by our biology is getting as much dopamine and serotonin as possible through physical human connection, and we spend most of our time being told the greatest lever for that is shameful and harmful usually because it doesn’t make strangers richer, which is ridiculous in an age where if we had the correct priorities we would be able to do for fun as procreation that comes as a result is now chemically optional.
My point is humanity spends a whole lot of its time being miserable, toiling for widgets, to pursue or accept sexual partners in a roundabout way because we’ve made that that a small, token, conditional cookie for doing the “important” stuff, which I find sad and fascinating to observe. The point being used as a bargaining chip for the pointless, and then all parties wondering why they’re still anxious and depressed because they either didn’t come to terms, or because they did and it turns out all the plastic, silicon, and tea in china can’t provide even a passing shadow of the fulfillment of genuine, physical human connection can, and even that physical human connection is tarnished being turned into just another form of currency or coercion for stuff that doesn’t matter at all. How much does humanity toiling for that does not matter instead of fucking?
Tldr humanity would be happier if we were trained to see sex as connection with one another and not that dirty, evil thing of which we rarely speak and if we do it is with the utmost sense of serious danger. It’s too late for most existing humans though, as you can’t go to full grown adults steeped in that cultural stigma and say “oops we fucked up, our sexuality isnt some taboo evil thing with no place in society.” The damage is done. My hill is that shouldn’t continue that harmful culture going forward, but I recognize I’ll die on that hill as a tiny minority that sees the harm it does.