Hold my arms in a position so that my hands grab the sides of my belly.
(which wasn’t even something I was consciously doing, but apparently it was enough to make a fellow male teenager exclaim sarcastically that I was truly standing there in a very heterosexual way)
kissing your son
I was born in Victorian Britain and have a very mirthful air about me.
So one day I was going about my merry business, being my jovial self.
When I’m walked a creature that saw what I was about, smiled at me and said ‘well aren’t you the gayest person I’ve met all day’.
I’m not sure how to feel tbh
Haven’t heard “gay” as a pejorative in real life since high school in the late 90s.
Yeah, school.in the 90’s was so gay.
I was told I’m gay because I like knitting.
I mean, yes I’m gay, but not because of that.There’s a knitting community, but it’s pretty slow. Crochet gets a little more action.
Knitting is a form of computing and computing is women’s work. So yeah, super gay, just like all the other programmers. /s
We’ll programmers do enjoy their programming socks
My programming does suck sometimes, but I wouldn’t say I enjoy it.
It would be really weird if that was cause and effect. I like to imagine how that might go down though.
It’s funny to me all the times that I’ve been considered not manly enough, whether it’s wearing my hot pink vans or a pink shirt or tie, allowing my gf or now my daughters to paint my nails, and tons of other examples I’ve been called gay for too. It made me think, what really makes a man. And going by their own definition, isn’t it one sign of a man to not be swayed by the opinion of someone who seeks only to denigrate? So why would I care about their opinion?
Wear a kilt?
TBH I’ve never tried and nobody told me it was gay. But I’m a sweaty person and I would love to air out my crotch except for fear of social criticism.
Take my pants all the way off when I poop
Putting a wig on my best friend and spooning him while he’s asleep.
Driving a red sedan
I can’t even follow the logic behind this one.
Come on its obvious! Sedan - see Dan. Staring at a man called Dan.
Also ‘red’ has 3 letters, just like ‘gay’.
Y’all better not be driving any green (gayer) or yellow (gayest) vehicles either!
Use a bidet
Wearing an earring in your right ear, but it’s ok to wear it in the left… Or the other way around. I could never remember which.
Using black eyeliner.
Wipe your ass.
Are dudes really out there with shitty cheeks because “wiping is gay”? I refuse to believe this
I know many toxic masculinity guys, I think it’s true. Eww.
Hopefully they eat lots of dietary fiber
100%. Even meet someone who sort of smells like shit? Outside of some rare medical disorders, they smell like this because they don’t wipe. A couple kids in my class once argued something like “my dog doesn’t wipe when he poos, we aren’t supposed to either”.
Lots of lady friends complained to me in the past about their boyfriend’s skid marks and asked me what my girlfriend did to remove them from the wash. Like it was a totally normal “boys will be boys” trope.
What the fuck
I… actually don’t think I’ve ever met someone that smelled like literal shit. Some homeless people that smell like piss, sure, but that has other reasons.
I almost feel sorry for these people, surely this idea of not wiping has to come from somewhere and it’s not something they came up with.
Usually comes from the father from my experience.
TIL I’m gay
